so how #2

I've been pestering Farhan to take me to the newly opened Murni somewhere in USJ. Konon macam nak buat the in thing now la. I went to the old Murni once tapi laaaaame gila dulu and I forgot the taste of the foods already so I think the foods weren't mind blowing sedap la coz kalau tak sure perut I ingat sampai sekarang. I jenis very particular with everything. Nak pergi mana-mana, nak makan kat somewhere new mesti I buat research dulu. Very the statement kipas diri. Tapi usually ended up tak pergi pun. Hangat-hangat tahi ayam citpoodah.

So I googled la Murni USJ. Clicked one of the link, baca-baca bla bla bla then puked. Geli gila. Tak payah la pergi secool mana that place is. Rela I makan nasik telur mata dengan kicap kat rumah la. Look at the picture upstairs (Mimi, do I sound like a foreigner?lol) What's in the yolk? Looks like a roach to me? Ke ape? Tell me what u can see.

You are what you eat. Input kotor output pun sama lah. By output I didn't mean your poops. Lol. Jiwa hati nurani peribadi all that. My aunt EVERY SINGLE THING die buat sendiri. From jam sampai lah goreng pisang and every thing in between. Kakak I pernah kena marah coz she bought goreng pisang. My aunt said 'orang jual tu tah solat tah tidak. Gelap hati makan yang orang tak solat masak.'

So memang geeeeelap lah hati I coz almost everyday pun beli je breakfast, lunch, dinner. Oh lepas tu baru I ingat last week I went to Sushi Bonanza courtesy of my sister. Now dah ade notice saying that Unagis contained less than 0.05% alcohol. But since Unagi is my favourite I said 'Edible kot since very little. Tak memabukkan ni' to my sister *put Unagi in mouth. nom nom*. Finished the first plate, took the second plate tiba-tiba rasa tak yakin. Terus I put it back on the conveyer belt. Sampai sekarang I rasa bersalah to my sister and her daughter sebab she is still breastfeeding. Sarah, maafkan ciksu.


Tapi yang dah berkarton Unagi I makan before this tu apa? Tak kan la right now baru letak alcohol kan? Mesti dah trade secret resipi turun temurun. Patut la hati I gelap. Sigh. Ni belum masuk bab mamak lagi. TGIF, Chili's apa semua pun boleh join. Ni la harga yang perlu dikorbankan dengan arus pemodenan. Ayat konon hebat. Now, I dah macam malas to eat out. Tapi most of the times I have to since I'm very busy. Ceh. Ni belum nanti I jadi career woman. Dah la I makan sorang rasa macam tak worth it kung kang kung kang kat dapur masak sikit je makan alone gila kesian kau weh. So how?











ps: to my sister, rajin-rajinkan lah memasak. Lol.
pps: I'm on diet. Almost two days without rice. Lihat perutku...

so tell me.

What do you really want in life? Ever gave it a thought? Had a conversation which made me realised how fortunate I am. Tapi manusia memang lah. Bad luck kecik gila memang nampak terus nak kupas dari segenap sudut terus question why porque kenapa. Tapi all the good things yang everyday pun datang dalam diri mesti went unnoticed.

Ade satu miniature lolipop yang gila boleh buat kau drolls dengan satu lolipop chupachup tujuh posen yang kecik tapi edible. Which one do you choose? Basically that's the summary of the conversation. Like all the good things in life aren't perfect. U have to give some to get some u know.

Biar lah kau ade lollipop yang gila besar tapi macam tak de guna. I'd rather stick to my chupachup. Like what's the point of having an unedible lolipop kan? Alhamdulillah I had the chance to get to know the most awesome dad who really loved me, who cared about me tenderly, who never raised his voice let alone to hurt me. Though he's now I gone I know that he loved me. He loved us. Saya takde ayah now but I know it's waaaaay better than having a dad yang every single day nampak depan mata tapi tak dapat rasa his love. Yang tak pernah wish birthday, yang tak pernah concern of my whereabouts tapi has millions in the bank. Kebahagiaan tu subjektif. Which one is your desire?

Oh I'm currently at home. It was a bit weird when only my mom fetched me. They used to fetch me. But somehow it feels like he's still here. Macam dia pergi surau tak balik lagi kind of feelings. Like I'm still waiting for him. Kalau i tell to others bout this they'll go like 'he's gone. sabar la'. I know that he's gone tapi macam tah la. But my bestfriend, Ayu who had to went thru all this when she was 11 years old said she still have that kind of waiting feeling after these years. So I think only people who went thru all this understands. Kot.

ps:doakan ape yang i buat sekarang adalah yang terbaik. thanks

Mbdsjngrhk

Kalau orang tak cakap takziah kau nak emo cakap orang x considerate ignore kau punye suffering.tapi kalau orang cakap takziah pun kau nak emo cakap orang tak paham perasaan kau nak happy sekejap terus turned off.sigh.so how?